


Rock and Roll Problems

by impertinence



Category: Vampire Diaries (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-10-31
Updated: 2010-10-31
Packaged: 2017-10-13 00:08:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 19,054
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/130666
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/impertinence/pseuds/impertinence
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Caroline gets turned into a werewolf. Then things really go to hell.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Rock and Roll Problems

**Author's Note:**

> Title from The Hold Steady. Thanks to Abby for looking this over.

It wasn't like Caroline wasn't used to being called a whore. Hello, most popular girl in school. But being called a whore by _Tyler Lockwood_ after he'd _licked_ her _neck_?

Maybe she was overreacting, but ugh, seriously. _Ugh._

The party had sucked anyway, though, so she left it right after that happened. Bonnie was busy and Elena was doing things she wouldn't talk about with Stefan and gross creepy Damon, and Matt was out of town interviewing for some scholarship or finding himself or something, he'd told Caroline but she was a little drunk right now and so she wasn't sure. And now she had Tyler's spit all over her neck, and really, she should have wiped it off – except it was summer and she already felt kind of gross and sticky, and then she'd just have spit on her hand, so why bother?

All in all, she thought it was totally, a hundred percent understandable when she got so distracted she walked in front of the car.

When she opened up her eyes again she was kind of weirded out by the whole not being dead thing. She was in a hospital, and everything hurt, though, so she didn't waste brain power wondering why she was alive. "Ow," she said.

Elena and Bonnie appeared above her. "Oh, thank God," Bonnie said. "I – Caroline, we – "

"I'm not dead." Caroline tried to lift her arm, but it didn't move. "Am I? How bad is it?"

"Your arms are broken," Bonnie said. "And your neck..."

"Oh, God." Not her neck again, seriously, couldn't she catch a break? "What happened?"

"Your head was almost torn off," Elena said. She looked really worried. She should be, Caroline thought, a little vicious in spite of the whole almost-dying thing. "They say the skin was broken, but..."

"There's barely going to be a scar," Bonnie said. She didn't sound all that pleased. Then again, Bonnie totally hated weird things happening in town, unless it was witchy things. Well, and she hated a lot of those too.

"Maybe I got magically healed." Caroline thought about the jewelry she was wearing. No magic, unless Icing was seriously holding back on her. Clothes? Probably not. "Or maybe they were just wrong about the crash."

"You're high, for one thing," Elena said.

That made sense, she thought. Maybe. "Will I be okay?"

Bonnie and Elena exchanged a look. "Yes," Elena said. "I'm going to talk to Stefan about it, okay? We'll figure it out."

Stefan, Elena's wonderful boyfriend, who was hot and rich and perfect. Right. "Do that," Caroline said, and closed her eyes so Elena wouldn't see how mad she was.

Hopefully, anyway. The whole world was swimming. She wasn't a good liar when she was drunk, she didn't see how being stoned would be any different.

"Tell my mom I want my makeup," she said, and faked sleep till they left.

||

They let her sit up three days later. She kept telling people she was fine – okay, kind of bruised and cut up and stuff, but not in tons of pain. She'd only been on the pain medication for a day. But they kept telling her she had broken bones and she shouldn't move.

Which was funny, because none of her bones _felt_ broken.

Sitting up was nice, though. It meant she could watch TV. Bonnie had brought her her homework, but please: if she'd almost died, she could totally swing some extra time for her schoolwork.

She was watching cartoons at nine in the morning when her mom came back. She only visited Caroline once a day, and then in the afternoon, because she was so busy being a cop for a town with barely any crime, or whatever.

Well, barely any crime aside from all the people dying. But that was different.

"Are you supposed to be sitting up?"

"Are you supposed to be here? It's morning."

"I took the day off." She came closer. "You look terrible."

"Oh, great. Thanks."

"I mean - " Mom took a deep breath. It was really kind of sad, how bad at this she was. "I mean you still look hurt."

"Well, I was hit by a car."

"The doctors said you had some cracked ribs. And that you should have had a broken neck."

Caroline shrugged. "They were wrong, I guess."

"Are you sure?" She came a little closer. "If something like that is wrong, shouldn't you tell the doctors?"

And that was just...ugh. She couldn't stop herself from being irritated. "What, I'm supposed to be like, 'hey, so I know you say I have lots of broken bones and stuff, but I feel totally fine'? I'm sure _that_ would go over well."

Just like that, Mom was back to being Mom. "I was trying to help."

"Whatever. Just - I'm tired. Okay?"

Mom frowned. "Okay."

Caroline closed her eyes, hoping if she just stayed still long enough, Mom would leave. Except she didn't.

This, she was starting to realize, was going to suck.

||

They examined her again on the fifth day and released her almost right away. The doctor wasn't looking her in the eye. She couldn't help but wonder what kind of lie they were going to think up - were they just going to call it a miracle? Caroline would have liked some real answers, and instead she was wheeled out of the hospital and given a bottle of pain medication she and the doctors both knew she wouldn't need.

Whatever, Caroline was over it. It would be fine; things would go back to normal. They had to. She was healthy, and going back to school, and Stefan hadn't said anything dire, and she was _fine_. Probably. Hopefully.

She didn't talk much on the ride back.

||

She woke up at five minutes to six. It basically looked like her phone was making fun of her. She hadn't gotten to sleep till one, _again_.

This was the fourth day. And she felt like she'd slept for forever.

She closed her eyes, hoping she'd just magically go back to sleep, or something. It was totally crazy to not be tired. Maybe she was getting sick.

Right, Caroline, she thought. Magical sickness that means you're not tired? Please.

She touched the scar on her neck and shivered. It felt wrong. It felt...

It felt like it was something she should be talking to Elena about. God, she didn't want to get mixed up in magic stuff. It had been bad enough when Damon did his _thing_. It still made her feel a little sick to think about.

And oh, great, now she definitely wasn't going to go to sleep. Fine, then. She rolled out of bed and put on running shorts and a sports bra, grabbing her iPod. It was probably (definitely) pretty dumb to go running out in the dark with headphones in, like first prize, enjoy your rape and also your murder _stupid_ , but she just – she needed time alone. Or, time to run. Whatever.

She couldn't think about any of this. It was just too weird.

All the cheerleaders were required to be able to run an eight-minute mile, but Caroline was totally not an underachiever, so she could run a six-minute, and then two eight-minutes right after it. Tonight, though, she was running way faster than a six minute – and when she hit the gas station that was about four miles from her house, she just kept going.

Her broken ribs should probably hurt, but they didn't even twinge. Maybe they'd healed like her neck. The thought made her run even faster.

The world was blurring by now. She should have stopped, she thought. She should be tired. Actually, she should be gasping for breath and like, writhing in pain on the ground. God, panic time. Panic time so, so much.

She stopped as suddenly as she'd started and tried not to throw up. Her whole body was shaking, but she still wasn't tired. She could practically feel her muscles seizing up.

Whatever was going on, she obviously needed help. So she did the only realistic thing she could think of and called Bonnie for help.

||

Bonnie was wearing her pajamas when she drove up next to Caroline. Her lips were pressed together in a way that looked scarily like Mom's. She unlocked the door and watched Caroline get inside with an expression that pretty much said, "Oh my god, you idiot."

"It was an accident," Caroline said when they started driving.

"Getting stranded? Yeah, I'd kind of hope so." Bonnie sighed. "What the hell, Caroline?"

"I just...I started running."

"Why? Did your car run out of gas or something?"

Caroline shook her head. She couldn't force the words out to explain. "I just – I had a bad day, okay? Night. Thing. Whatever. I'm not going to school, can you just drop me off at home?"

Bonnie was quiet until they passed the Welcome to Mystic Falls sign. Then she said, "Does this have something to do with Damon? Because I swear to God, if he's hurting you again -"

"No!" God, she wished. That would be simpler, at least. "No, it's just...I can't talk about it." Her hand went to the scar on her neck before she thought. "I just can't, okay?"

But Bonnie was too smart for Caroline to lie to her. She glanced in the mirror, saw where Caroline's hand was, and swerved pulling over. "What's going on?" she said, grabbing Caroline's wrist and pulling her hand away.

Or at least, she would have pulled Caroline's hand away if Caroline had let her. But since she had super-strength or whatever now, it was easy to keep her hand there.

Not that that made Bonnie any less suspicious. "Caroline! Tell me what's going on."

She had her super-serious I Failed A Chem Test And Also I'm Being Haunted look on. Caroline knew she was totally screwed, secrets-wise. "Tyler kind of licked me."

Bonnie blinked. "Ew."

"And now I have a scar."

"You were in a car accident, that makes sense. Wait – no. You mean from Tyler?"

Caroline nodded.

"Oh, God." Bonnie slumped back against the driver's seat. "What? _God._ "

"I don't know what happened," Caroline said. "There's something wrong with me."

Bonnie didn't answer. She looked sort of scary distant, actually.

"Bonnie?" Caroline said after a minute.

Bonnie turned the car back on and pulled onto the road. "It's fine. We'll figure out what happened."

"Yeah, I mean, okay," Caroline said. "Except – where are we going?"

"Grams'," Bonnie said grimly. "She left the house to me. All her books are there. There'll be answers in one of them."

Caroline could tell, even as freaked out as she was, that Bonnie didn't want to talk anymore. So she leaned back and held onto the door handle when Bonnie took turns too hard, trying not to be scared.

It so didn't work. When they finally got to Grams' – to Bonnie's? – Caroline had pretty much convinced herself that she had Lockwood Ebola. On one hand, it was nice that this freaky disease basically gave her superpowers. On the other hand, it was her senior year and she didn't want to die.

"Caroline. Get out of the car."

Caroline did, trying hard not to think about dying. It was okay. Bonnie would fix things. She -

A bunch happened at once. She tripped getting out of the car, and then tried to stop herself from falling, only she was freaking out so bad that she pushed against the car way harder than she really needed to, and the car creaked and almost fell over, and then Bonnie was staring at her like she was an alien, which Caroline really thought might be true.

"Let's go inside," Bonnie said.

Caroline followed with her head down.

"Okay." Bonnie sat down at the kitchen table and cupped her hands lightly, making them face the ceiling. "Believe it or not, witches have a kind of library charm. We can search based on keywords, basically."

Caroline believed it. Witches were kind of scary, honestly.

"So you need to tell me what happened," Bonnie said when Caroline didn't answer.

"Oh, right. Okay. Um, Tyler licked me, and then I got in a car crash and healed really quickly, and I don't know, now I can hear really well and I'm strong and I can kind of – smell you."

"Smell me?"

"Like, your fear. And – stuff." Bonnie smelled like Elena and some other person who wasn't Elena or Caroline or Bonnie herself, and also smelled like a girl. If Caroline was doing the smelling-people thing right, which she honestly might not be.

"Right," Bonnie said. "Okay. Hang on, I'll do this."

She muttered and waved her hands some, and books started floating off the shelves and circling her. It was honestly pretty impressive, or at least it would have been if Caroline wasn't totally terrified. It wasn't her fault; anyone would have been scared if this was happening to them. Or at least, that's what she told herself. If it was Elena she probably would have charmed the Lockwood Ebola and if it was Bonnie she might have just badassed it away, but she wasn't either of them, so...whatever.

Babbling in her head wasn't helping. She tried to make herself shut up.

"Oh," Bonnie said, frowning down at the book she was holding open. "Caroline? Sit down."

Caroline didn't. "Tell me what it is."

"No, seriously." Bonnie flicked her fingers and Caroline felt like there was a huge weight on her shoulders. "Sit down."

Since Caroline didn't want to be creepily magicked into actually sitting, she did it. "Tell me now."

Bonnie took a deep breath and looked her in the eye. She actually looked kind of sad, Caroline thought distantly. "You're a werewolf."

Oh. "Crap," Caroline said, and passed out.

||

She wasn't out for long. She woke up on Bonnie's couch, with Bonnie frowning down at her like she'd done something wrong.

"Sorry," she said, and sat up. Ugh, her hair even _felt_ awful. "I can't be a werewolf," she said, memory smacking her. "That's impossible."

"Vampires and witches aren't, why not werewolves?"

"Because -" Actually, there was no non-crazy reason. Caroline frowned. "Just because they can't, okay?"

"Because you might be one, and this kind of thing can't happen to normal people, right?"

"That's not fair. I'm not calling you a freak or something."

Bonnie crossed her arms. "Yet."

And Caroline loved Bonnie, she really, really did, but Bonnie didn't have to make this all about her freaky witch issues and stuff. "Okay, seriously? Can we talk about me for, you know, two seconds?"

Bonnie at least looked kind of embarrassed. "Yeah. We can, I'm sorry."

"It's fine." Kind of. "So – okay, what's going to happen to me?"

"Well, you're going to turn into a wolf."

Caroline rolled her eyes. "Yeah, I know that part. What else?"

"Do you really know that part?"

Sometimes it sucked to have friends who like, knew you. "Full moon. Wolf-ness. So?"

"You'll lose your mind and turn into a rabid killing machine. Sorry."

Caroline felt a little faint again. "Okay, what else?"

"You can do it any time you want after the first shift," Bonnie said. "And you won't lose your mind except the three days around the full moon. We're going to have to get you a cage or something."

"The vampires probably have a creepy dungeon thing," Caroline said, thinking of Damon.

"You know that for sure?"

"It just seems like something they'd do."

"Fair enough," Bonnie said. "Okay, so all kinds of freaky stuff is going to happen to you. You'll smell things differently and your moods will change with the moon."

"I get a second PMS?" This was right up there with – Caroline didn't even know. Her mom making her quit cheerleading, or Damon coming back to embarrass her in front of the whole school. Something really heinous. "That's not fair!"

"I don't think any of this is." Bonnie sighed. "Do you want me to just make you a list of the symptoms? That way you can study them when you want."

Caroline heard what she was really saying, which was _when you're not busy freaking out and not really listening to me._ She nodded.

"Okay," Bonnie said after a few more handwaves and words in other languages, "so. Ice cream?"

Caroline shook her head. "Summer training's coming up, I don't want to be gross for it."

"You're a werewolf, honey. Your metabolism's going to go through the roof."

"In that case, five scoops," Caroline said. "And a blanket. Please?"

She slumped back in the chair when Bonnie started clattering around the kitchen. She missed Matt way more than she felt like she should, and she wanted to call him or get so falling-down drunk she forgot to miss him. It was so stupid. Like, oh no, something bad happened, I need my boyfriend. But she just – she thought maybe Matt would have dealt with it. He dealt with lots of stuff.

Which really was an argument for breaking up with him and not _burdening_ him more. Caroline hated her life.

"Stop brooding and come to the living room," Bonnie said. Caroline would have stuck her tongue out and said something rude, except Bonnie was carrying her ice cream – five scoops like Caroline had asked for, and then one scoop for herself.

Caroline sat in the plush chair and basically buried her face in the ice cream. "I hate my life," she told the chocolate chunks.

"It's not that bad," Bonnie said.

Caroline stared at her.

"Look, it sucks, I know. But it could be worse."

Caroline kept staring. It was working pretty okay for her so far.

Bonnie sighed. "Okay, look. It totally sucks. But you're still you, you'll just...turn into a wolf sometimes."

"You're not helping."

"I'm trying to tell you I've been there."

And Caroline knew it was massively immature and unfair of her, but she said it anyway. "Have you? Have you really? Because you found out that you're a witch, okay, that's cool and new, I get to turn into a wolf. Not fun, Bonnie. Not a superpower!"

"Right, yeah, it's fun." Bonnie clenched her hands into fists and it occurred to Caroline that she might have made a mistake. "Having my grandmother die and everything I know about the world rearranged was a real laugh riot."

When she put it like that it really did sound like it sucked. But still, "You don't have a second PMS and you're not going to turn into a wolf. I win."

Bonnie closed her eyes. When she opened them, she looked...witchy. Really freaky. "Get out."

"I – what?"

"Get out. Now. Leave, go home, I'll call you when I stop wanting to –"

"Whoa, okay, no details, I don't want to hear about how you want to use my spleen in a spell or something." Caroline got to the door by sort of scooting along the wall. Somehow, she didn't want to just turn her back on Bonnie right now. Mostly because Bonnie looked fully prepared to kill her. "See you at school tomorrow, okay?"

Bonnie flicked a hand and the door slammed in her face.

Ugh.

The walk home took forever. She could have used her new superpowers to run, but someone might have seen her, and anyway, it was...weird.

Mom wasn't home yet, which meant they'd probably be having takeout for dinner. Which sucked, because Caroline was _starving_. Like full-on, eat a horse hungry.

Which, hey, being a werewolf meant she was way less likely to get fat, right? Caroline opened the fridge, pulled out the leftover Chinese, and went nuts.

Once she'd stuffed her face, she went upstairs. Normally right now she'd be hanging out with Bonnie and Elena, calling Matt, or going somewhere with the girls from the squad. But things were so not normal right now that Caroline was fine with lying on her bed and staring at the ceiling.

Or at least, she was until the front door slammed and startled her and she ended up flailing her arm, catching her bed post, and breaking it.

"Caroline? What was that noise?"

"Nothing, Mom!" Crap. Crap crap _crap_. Super glue wasn't going to fix this. "I...I have a headache, though. Can I talk to you later?"

"Do you want me to bring you something?"

"No! No, I'm fine. Just -" Stay downstairs. "It's fine. Don't worry about me."

She thought she probably sounded about as convincing as she had when she was three and a constant cookie-stealer, but Mom just said, "Let me know when you feel better," and left her alone.

Thank god.

She wanted to call someone, but there was really no one she could talk to about this. Well, Bonnie if she wasn't mad, and Elena if Caroline really wanted to share with her or whatever, but -

But Caroline didn't want to share. It wasn't like this was something special and private, because it totally wasn't. She just...didn't want Elena to know for right now. Elena had tons going on and it wasn't like she was big on including Caroline in it.

Okay. So. Fixing the post. She held it up and took a deep breath. She could totally find something to fix it.

Five minutes later, she gave up and called Matt. "So I know you're traveling and everything and it's super important to like, get space, and I totally respect that, but if something really big and wooden was broken how would you fix it?"

"Um," Matt said. "Nails?"

"So not an option."

Matt paused. "How strong does it need to be?"

"Not very?" Unless they were going to be having adventurous sex, which since he was traveling, probably not. Or Caroline could have adventurous sex with someone else. Right, because she totally wasn't hung up on Matt or anything stupid like that.

"Wood glue, then?" Matt sounded really confused. "Caroline, what's going on?"

"Nothing!" Caroline said, and hung up on him.

Wood glue. Totally doable. All she had to do was sneak out of the window her mother had purposely made practically impossible to sneak out of.

Then something occurred to her and she couldn't stop smiling. Because Mom hadn't actually made the window impossible for a _werewolf_ to get out of.

Jumping out was this insanely impossible rush. It didn't occur to her until after she'd hit the ground about twenty feet away from the house and rolled to absorb the impact, feeling like a superhero or something, that she realized someone might have seen.

She hopped to her feet and looked around, but no one was there. And – she inhaled experimentally. She couldn't really smell anyone, either.

Though she could smell some kind of poop, and trash. Ew. This was supposed to be a nice neighborhood, and apparently people couldn't clean up after themselves.

Not her problem right now, though. Right now she needed glue.

Hardware store.

The wolf part of her – which, ugh, she didn't want there to be a wolf part of her, and it didn't help that the wolf didn't particularly want there to be a human part of it – wanted to just go out and bite someone. It didn't really understand glue, or why it was necessary right now.

She thought angry things at it, but that just made it louder, so she started thinking about babies and bunnies and cuddling with Matt until it shut up.

Buying the glue was easy, obviously, but getting home with it wasn't. She didn't want to risk jumping back into her window; with her luck she'd smack into the wall, go right through it, and make Mom have a heart attack. When she finally managed to sneak back in, she spent two minutes reading the glue instructions and five minutes calling Matt over and over.

He sounded annoyed when he finally picked up. She really couldn't blame him. "Okay, okay, sorry, I know, but I don't know how to use wood glue and my mom is _seriously_ going to kill me."

"I'm kind of busy, Caroline."

"Matt."

She knew exactly how pathetic she sounded, thank you very much, so she wasn't surprised when he said, "Okay, fine. I'll walk you through it. But you're going to have to tell me what you broke."

She hung up and put her face in her pillow.

But it couldn't be _that_ hard, right? It was just glue. She grabbed it without taking her face out of the pillow and got it out of the plastic. She could do this. It would be awesome and self-sufficient. Total morons took shop class and passed, and anyway, none of them had superstrength.

It took her two hours. When she was finally done, there were squelchy little lumps of glue sticking out and the bedpost was sort of crooked. So every time Mom came into the room, Caroline was just going to have to distract her, or something.

No problem, Caroline thought a little hysterically.

She probably would have just lain around thinking about how much her life sucked, or something, except Elena called her. "Have you seen Bonnie?"

Oh, great, Caroline got to be Middle Girl now. "Uh, not since she was a total bitch to me and stormed off, no."

"Caroline -" Elena sighed. "She's not answering her phone, and things are a little...tense right now. If she calls, just let me know, okay? I'm worried."

"I talked to her just a few hours ago."

"Still," Elena said. "Call me. Please."

"Fine," Caroline said. "Grill later?"

"Not tonight. I'll see you at school." And just like that, Elena hung up.

God, Mystic Falls totally sucked lately. Caroline sighed and resigned herself to a night of boringness. Well, boringness and werewolf...ing.

Seriously. _Suck._

||

Her dreams were seriously gross, all full of blood and guts and howling, but when she woke up she felt excellent. Being a werewolf clearly wasn't totally terrible.

Just mostly.

She made it all the way to lunch before Elena accosted her (whatever, Caroline knew SAT words). "Have you talked to Bonnie?"

"Okay, did I or did I not tell you I would let you know when I did?"

Elena didn't even look embarrassed. "I'm worried. You can't blame me for staying on top of things."

Actually, Caroline totally could, but she kept that to herself. "Bonnie's a big girl. You should trust her to take care of herself."

"I do trust her. I don't trust everyone else in this town."

Caroline was going to answer with something appropriately snippy when she realized she could smell Elena's worry, and -

Oh, ew. She could smell _sex_ now? She was totally going to turn into one of those people who hated high school if this crazy stuff kept up. "I have to go," she said. "I'll tell you though, okay? I promise. I care about her too."

That was laying it on a little thick, she thought, but Elena looked comforted. "Thanks," she said. "And -"

"And?"

"Are you sure you're okay?" Elena said. "You just seem sort of...distracted."

Caroline wanted to say something mean for no other reason than that she hated the idea that anyone could tell what was wrong with her. Instead she said, "I'm totally fine, I promise. And if I'm not, I'll let you know, okay?"

"Okay," Elena said, looking suspicious. But she left, thank God. Caroline didn't think she could talk about their feelings more.

Especially since she was starting to really worry about Bonnie.

The rest of the day was seriously, seriously weird. Her powers or whatever were developing, so the world was changing pretty much every minute. She could smell most emotions and infer the ones she couldn't, and she almost broke her locker when she yanked on it – normally it needed a yank, but apparently a yank at werewolf strength was way, way stronger than a normal yank.

"Yank" was starting to lose its meaning. She wished she could talk to someone else about this stuff instead of rambling to herself like a total weirdo.

She got a call from Matt while she was walking home. "Aren't you in school, too?"

"We get out earlier here," Matt said. "I have to call you now, I'm tending bar at this place later today."

"You're too young to be a bartender."

"I got lucky," Matt said.

"Well, be careful." She wasn't going to worry about him. She totally, totally wasn't. Because he could take care of himself, and anyway, she had tons of problems of her own to worry about. "And be careful."

There was a huff of air that might have been a laugh. "Thanks, Caroline. I will."

"I have to go," she lied. "Mom's being super strict."

"Again? What'd you do?"

"It's more what I didn't do," she said, and listened to him laugh for real. "I'll talk to you tomorrow, okay?"

"Okay." Matt paused. "I love you."

It felt like a punch in the stomach. Matt loved her, and she was a werewolf. "I love you too."

She leaned against the fence just outside her house, trying to keep her emotions in. Feelings were stupid and, in this case, totally useless. What was she going to do with them? It wasn't like she could just magically become not a werewolf by wishing. It was just that she wanted Matt so much. She missed him and loved him, and eventually he'd come back and she'd have to tell him and he'd never speak to her again.

Her stomach twisted. Her feelings felt sharper when it came to Matt. Not more real, just - worse. Way, way worse, and thinking about him made her just want to...

She was a little surprised when she changed. For one thing, it hurt. For another, she thought it couldn't happen outside the full moon.

But she almost died of shock when she looked up, confused, and saw Bonnie staring at her with her mouth so far open Caroline could see the dangly thing at the back of her throat.

"Um, hi?" she tried to say. It came out as a bark.

"Oh, my God," Bonnie said, and staggered backward. "You - you're - oh God. Oh _God._ "

Caroline tried to think through the panic. She needed to change back. Now would be a totally awesome time to do it. She could change back and explain things to Bonnie, and then Bonnie would stop looking at her like she thought Caroline was going to eat her.

"Oh God," Bonnie said again.

Yeah, okay, Caroline wasn't Mother Teresa. "Cut it out," she snapped. "You know I'm not going to kill you or something, God, stop being such a drama queen."

"I'm going to go," Bonnie said. Her voice was low and soothing. It kind of made Caroline want to wag her tail, but she was way too stubborn to do that. "You can stop being mad, and change back, once I've gone."

"Would it help if I apologized for what I said?" Caroline barked. "God, Bonnie, you're so high-maintenance, you -"

And then Bonnie made a big mistake: she started running.

 _Chase!_ Caroline's brain shrieked. _Chase, chase, chase!_

So she did.

It took her maybe five seconds to pounce on Bonnie, bringing her down hard to the ground (though she didn't break anything, thankfully. Bonnie would never forgive her then). Once she had Bonnie there her brain was screaming at her to do something, anything, to make Bonnie stay - and by something, the wolf-brain meant ripping her throat out. Luckily Caroline wasn't stupid, and dug her heels in. "No," she snarled. "This is Bonnie. She'll light us on fire or something if we try to kill her. Stop it!"

And then, almost without her realizing the change was starting, she was human, naked, and on top of Bonnie.

Well then.

"I guess you can't, like, magic me some clothes, can you?"

Bonnie snapped her fingers. Caroline was suddenly dressed in sweatpants and a t-shirt.

"Thanks," Caroline said, even though her first thought was that if Bonnie was going to have showy magic like that she should really think about learning to magic bras into existence.

"No problem," Bonnie said. "Do you think you could get off of me now?"

Caroline kind of didn't want to, but that was the wolf talking. Probably. Although Bonnie was kind of bony and probably didn't taste very good, so Caroline wasn't sure why the wolf would want to eat her.

"Sorry," she said. "Yes. Sorry."

Bonnie got up, brushing dirt off her and glancing around. "Anyone could have seen. That was really stupid."

"Oh, yeah, because I totally turn into a wolf on purpose. All the time. It's like, the number one perk of this whole werewolf thing, being able to freak my friends out and make the whole town want to kill me."

"Caroline."

" _Bonnie._ "

It was like something snapped. Bonnie sighed, shoulders loosening. "I'm sorry, okay? Why'd you change?"

Caroline bit her lip. "I don't want to talk about it."

"We have to figure this out."

"No, _I_ have to figure this out. This has nothing to do with you."

"I'm your friend. Come on, Caroline, we've fought before. Just...let's just let it go, okay? Weird stuff is happening, even more than you probably realize. So can we just forget all the stupid stuff we said?"

"What weird stuff?"

"Elena's boyfriend and his brother's vampire ex came to town and is terrorizing everybody," Bonnie said. "So why'd you change?"

"Whoa, whoa, wait. His and his _brother_ 's ex? She told me the Salvatores weren't doing some weird threesome thing!"

"She doesn't talk to me about it much." Bonnie crossed her arms. "Caroline. Spill."

And just like that, she was sad all over again. "Matt. He's going to find out, and then he'll hate me."

"If he hates you, I'll kill him." Bonnie sounded casual enough that Caroline thought she might mean it. Scary. "He'll be shocked, but he won't hate you. He'd have to be crazy to hate you."

"Says the girl who hates Elena's boyfriends," Caroline said.

"They're not both - whatever." Bonnie closed her eyes. "I just...when I touch them, I feel death. Okay? That's kind of a hard hurdle to get over when one of them has my best friend."

"What is this, 1950? He doesn't have her, Bonnie. He's just, you know, having sex with her."

"Is that supposed to help?"

"It doesn't matter either way," Caroline said. "Shouldn't you hate me too? Don't I feel like, I don't know, gross raw meat or something weird like that?"

"I haven't tested it," Bonnie said. Her expression was tight and unhappy, but Caroline couldn't feel guilty. They'd have to do this sooner or later.

"So do it," Caroline said, forcing herself to sound impatient and not scared to death. "Just get it over with."

"I don't -"

"Bonnie." Caroline glared with every inch of prom queen-ness that she could muster. "Do it _now_."

Bonnie sighed, closed her eyes, and reached out to touch Caroline's arm.

She yanked it back just a few seconds later, eyes opening. She looked shocked. "Oh God," Caroline said. "It's worse than death, isn't it."

"No," Bonnie said. "I mean, yes. Kind of. It's..."

Caroline was super patient and waited a whole ten seconds. "Spit it out, Bonnie!"

"Warm," Bonnie said. "Angry. But warm."

Angry. Yeah, that sounded about right. "So I'll end up ripping Matt apart, but at least he won't be cold while I do it," Caroline said.

If they'd been having a moment - which Caroline totally thought they might be - it was broken. "Ugh. Thanks for that visual."

"Welcome to my life," Caroline said. "Whatever, stuff sucks. Let's go to the Grill and you can tell me about Elena's sordid affair." At Bonnie's look, she added, "Or the evil vampire ex, which is probably more important. Whichever."

"If you say so," Bonnie said. "Don't you want to change first?"

Oh God, did being a werewolf mean she was going to stop caring what clothes she wore? Caroline shuddered. "Okay. Give me, like, five minutes," she said, and leaped over the fence. It was kind of hard to make it look normal, and she thought she probably still didn't look all that human, but it should be close enough to fool anyone who didn't already know. She hoped.

When she was dressed in actual clothes, she went back downstairs, walked out of the gate like a normal person, and said, "Let's go," leading the way without looking back to make sure Bonnie was following.

She would. She had to. Caroline might not be a MENSA candidate, but she was pretty sure she knew the meaning of the word "friendship", and there was totally a clause in there about not abandoning your friends when they were suddenly werewolves.

Or at least, there should be one in Mystic Falls.

The Grill was almost empty when they got there - it was only five, not even time for the dinner rush yet. Caroline grabbed them a table and tried not to inhale too much. The Grill _stank_ like onions, grease, and alcohol. And, okay, it had smelled kind of funky when she'd still been human, too, but this was a little much.

"You're making a face," Bonnie said, and set their sodas down. "What's wrong?"

"Smells," Caroline said. "This is diet, right?"

"Duh." Bonnie studied her. "There's probably a spell for that."

"Uh-uh. No way." Caroline shook her head, in case Bonnie wasn't getting the point. "I am not going to be your guinea pig. I have enough problems, thank you."

"I wouldn't experiment. I'll just, you know, try to figure out if there is one. Grams -"

Caroline stopped listening, because Bonnie's expression hadn't changed, but there was a sudden spike of _something_ , and Caroline knew Bonnie was upset the same way she knew her own name.

"Caroline."

She snapped back to reality. Bonnie was staring at her, looking more than a little annoyed. But she was still sad. Caroline hadn't realized she was that good a liar. "Sorry. What?"

"Grams kept really organized spellbooks," Bonnie said. "There might be something in one of them. I don't think I can invent spells yet, but I'll look into it."

"Okay. Thank you. Seriously, thank you." God, awkward much? "And don't worry about it," Caroline added, trying for her normal tone. "I'll just learn how to ignore it. It can be useful, anyway, when it's not telling me who had sex with who and gross stuff like that."

"Ugh." Bonnie tilted her glass towards Caroline's, toasting her. "That sucks."

"I mean, I can probably figure out how to make it an advantage, once it stops grossing me out so much."

"Once what stops grossing you out so much?" Elena said from behind her.

Only - Caroline frowned and turned around. That wasn't Elena. She knew how Elena smelled. This person just smelled sort of...musty.

"Caroline," Bonnie said tightly. "Caroline, run."

"Calm down," not-Elena said, smiling sunnily. "I thought you told her everything. That's what I heard, anyway."

Which meant she'd been following them. "Okay, that's seriously creepy," Caroline said. "Who are you, bizarro-Elena? Single white femaleing someone hasn't been popular since the nineties at _least_."

"She's cute," not-Elena said. "I think I'll keep her."

"You want to leave. Now."

Not-Elena must be seriously, seriously stupid, if she thought Bonnie sounding that deadly was funny. "I don't think so."

"Okay, that's enough," Caroline said loudly. "Who are you?" She already knew, but she really, really wanted to hear her say it. How could they look exactly the same?

Not-Elena reached out and stroked her cheek. Caroline jerked away; it made not-Elena smile. "You'll find out," she said, and sauntered away. If she was trying to imitate Elena she was doing the worst job ever.

Which answered the question, actually. "So that's the ex."

"Yeah." Bonnie slumped forward. She stank, she was so afraid. "That's Katherine."

Caroline took a sip of her Coke. "Stefan and Damon have bad taste," she offered, hoping to get a smile out of Bonnie.

It didn't work. "She's dangerous, Caroline. Really, really dangerous."

"I get it, okay? She's a scary monster. Like me."

"Not like you," Bonnie said. "Scarier than you, because she's hundreds of years old and evil. If you see her, run."

"How am I supposed to tell?"

"You can smell her."

"Then you should have said - okay, okay, I get it." Caroline held up her hands in surrender.

Bonnie stopped glaring. "I just wish we knew what she's up to."

"I'm sure we'll find out," Caroline said. "You know, eventually."

"Once she's killing us off, totally," Bonnie said. "Ugh."

"I want cheese fries," Caroline said, since the topic was clearly exhausted. "Delicious, not at all nutritious cheese fries."

"You know I can't eat them," Bonnie said, but she eyed the menu longingly.

"Just for tonight? Please? Otherwise I'll have to eat them alone and I'll feel like a total lamer." Caroline gave her the best puppy eyes she could.

"Oh, fine," Bonnie said. "Put me down for one, too. Oh, and by the way, Elena and Stefan are coming."

She said it so casually that for a second Caroline was sure she'd heard wrong. "Stefan? As in, vampire Stefan? As in, Damon's brother Stefan?"

"Yes," Bonnie said, a little mockingly. "Stefan Salvatore."

"Ugh," Caroline said.

"Basically. But -"

"What?"

"It's stupid. I just have this feeling." Bonnie looked down, shredding her napkin.

"You guys ready to order?" Mindy, who'd blown into town with some seriously interesting rumors behind her, was standing there with her pad out. Right, food. "Two cheese fries and, um. Two burgers." Being a werewolf was clearly expensive, too.

Mindy nodded and tucked the pad back into her apron. "Be right out," she said, and left them alone again.

"The burgers are for me," Caroline said.

"Yeah, I'd figured that out."

"What if Damon shows up? You hate him."

For some reason that got Bonnie all defensive. "So do you."

"Legitimately."

"I hate him legitimately, too."

Great. Now Caroline was defensive, too. "Fine. So we can agree that he won't show up. Awesome. Good."

"Better than good." Bonnie glared at a spot on the wall and drank more of her soda. "Unless he does," she said a few minutes later.

"Ugh."

"I'm not saying I want him to," Bonnie said. "Just that, you know, he might."

"He'd better not. I'll bite him to death."

"Can you even do that?"

Caroline shrugged. "I guess we'll find out."

"He probably won't show up, anyway."

"Right, because Damon always knows when he's not welcome."

She half expected Bonnie to say something about how bitter she sounded. Caroline would totally say something about it, in Bonnie's shoes. But Bonnie just said, "He won't be able to control you now."

"That doesn't make it better." Caroline accidentally bumped her foot against Bonnie's under the table. She moved it away quickly, staring down at the salt shaker for no good reason except that she really didn't feel like seeing Bonnie feeling sorry for her.

"Cheese fries," Mindy said, plunking them down.

Oh, good. "Thank you," Caroline said, and devoted the next fifteen minutes to stuffing her face as much as possible.

It wasn't that she didn't realize things were serious. She totally realized that. It was more that she didn't want to deal with it, and didn't see why she had to tonight. It seemed like the only times she hung out with Elena anymore were when things were super screwed up in some way. She wanted the old Mystic Falls back, the one where Elena's parents were still alive, she wasn't a werewolf, and Bonnie didn't walk around looking literally haunted all the time.

"Hey, guys," Elena said.

"Speak of the devil," Caroline said without thinking.

Elena gave her a weird look. "You guys weren't talking."

"It's a metaphor, hello."

"Right, okay." Elena pulled a stool up and sat down next to Caroline. "So."

"Bonnie told you, didn't she."

"I had to," Bonnie said defensively. "She was asking me if I knew what was up with you. I can't just keep things like that from Elena."

"Sure you can. It's easy. Elena, me and Matt haven't had sex yet. You totally didn't know that, did you?"

"I don't think your virginity is the same thing as being a werewolf," Elena said.

Stefan just looked uncomfortable.

"Hello, neither of us is a virgin," Caroline said. "God. Do you pay attention at all? Don't answer that."

Stefan was the only one who even cracked a smile. "Um, that was supposed to be funny," Caroline said. "By the way, Katherine decided to visit us. She's creepy and you should have told me about her."

"I'm sorry," Elena said.

"It's fine." It really was. The scents all over the place had her kind of dizzy, and so she wasn't in the mood for fighting. Stefan and Elena ordered while Caroline focused on finishing her cheese fries and stealing some of Bonnie's. The cheese smell was kind of soothing, because it was simple, and - Caroline inhaled as stealthily as she could. She was pretty sure the flowery, warm smell was Bonnie. It was simple, too. Not cheese-fry-simple, but still, nice. Comforting.

Yeah, okay, her friend smelled comforting. God, Caroline was a total, complete, grade-A freak.

She realized she was supposed to be paying attention when Bonnie kicked her. "...flush her out," Stefan was saying. "I know it won't be easy, but there has to be a way."

"We could - " Elena frowned. "I have no idea. You could try to get the message out that you, you know, wanted to get back together."

Stefan shook his head. "No."

"It wouldn't be real," Bonnie said. "You're not willing to even try it?"

"I'd be okay with it," Elena said. "That's why I suggested it."

"It's too dangerous," Stefan said. "Trying to manipulate Katherine would be like trying to make Caroline turn into a cat. Unhelpful."

"Hey," Caroline said. "No one is turning me into a cat. Cats _stink_ now, okay? Like, literally."

"So I can't have a familiar?" Bonnie said, smiling a little.

"Have a dog familiar. You're a witch, you should be able to do that." Caroline eyed the rest of Bonnie's fries longingly.

Bonnie rolled her eyes and pushed them across the table. "Here. You'll enjoy them more than I will, anyway."

"Thanks." Caroline grabbed a few and looked up - just in time to see Bonnie and Elena giving each other a Look with a capital L.

That wasn't unusual. Stefan meeting her eyes, looking kind of amused and annoyed, was.

"What?" she mouthed.

Stefan shrugged. Caroline was getting the feeling he still wasn't used to the whole Wonder Twin thing. It was cute, in the way where boys Caroline would never kiss in a million years could sometimes be.

Not that she didn't want to kiss Stefan. But since he and Elena were all married-y now, there was no way she was actually going to.

"Am I interrupting a moment? Or _multiple_ moments?" Damon lounged on the table, batting his eyelashes at Elena. "How rude of me."

God, he was so obvious it was gross. "Go away," Caroline said.

"Are those cheese fries?" Damon reached out for some - and their fingers brushed. It was all Caroline could do not to, like, throw the table over and start punching him, or something.

"Go _away_ ," she said again, yanking the fries away. "These are mine, you asshole."

"Telling you we were going to dinner wasn't actually an invitation," Elena said. She smelled annoyed, but she'd moved so that she and Caroline were shoulder-to-shoulder. That was nice of her, Caroline thought, even if she and Stefan were both -

Oh, great, that look they'd just given each other meant they were turned on over their, like, plotting Katherine's destruction. _Ew_.

"What's her deal?" Damon said, nodding at Caroline. "Did she hit her head or something?"

"She is sitting right here," Caroline said. "And no, I didn't hit my head."

"She's a werewolf," Bonnie said.

"Bonnie!" Caroline and Elena said at the same time.

But Bonnie's eyes were on Damon, and Caroline suddenly knew why she'd said it: it was a warning.

Huh. Caroline tossed her head and looked over at Damon, too. "And don't you forget it," she said.

"Fascinating," Damon said. "I suppose you know all about us naughty vampires now, too."

"Duh," Caroline said.

"Hmm." He pulled up a chair, ignoring Elena's protests and Bonnie's glare, and put his chin in his hands. "And what do you make of it?"

"None of your business."

"Oh, come on." His tone was cajoling, and she remembered it from before - except this was different. Now he was...something, Caroline couldn't pin it down. "Share."

"I think she's totally crazy and trying to manipulate her won't work," Caroline said, "which everyone agrees on. So go away."

"No," Damon said, drawing the word out. "How strong are you?"

And just like that, Caroline understood what was going on. "I'm not a science experiment," she said, and got up.

From Elena's expression, she expected Caroline to run off to the bathroom and cry - which, okay, Caroline had totally done before. But right now, she had other plans. Specifically, grabbing Damon's arm as tightly as she could and leading him away to the exit.

"When I say go, I always meant go," she said. "Only now? I can be an enforcer." She pushed him outside. "Goodnight."

When she turned around, the hostess was staring at her. "I don't think you can do that," the girl said weakly. "Isn't he friends with Mrs. Lockwood?"

Caroline rolled her eyes. "Like I care," she said, and went back to her table.

Bonnie wasn't the only one staring at her when she slid into a seat and said, "I'm back!", but she was the one who looked the most impressed. And hey, Caroline wasn't immune to praise or anything. She smiled at all of them, feeling honestly giddy, and said, "So. What did I miss?"

||

In the end they decided that trying to manipulate Katherine really was a stupid idea, and that they'd have to wait for her to come to them. Stefan was all in favor of everyone having a giant sleepover at the Salvatore house until things were resolved, until Elena pointed out that one of them would end up staking Damon, and they could all more or less take care of themselves anyway. "And I mean, I have you," she said, a little awkwardly.

Huh. Caroline hadn't thought about how weird it must be for her, being the only non-superpowered one.

"I just worry about her cornering one of you. None of us are strong enough to fight her."

"The head trick didn't work," Bonnie said. "She didn't even notice that I was trying."

"Or if she did, she didn't say anything - that's more likely." Stefan frowned. "You're sure you two are okay to go home?"

"We live close to each other," Caroline said. "Trust me, we'll be fine. Go home and have sex where Damon can hear you, or whatever."

Elena and Stefan both winced. It was kind of funny. "Goodnight," Elena said, and they walked to Stefan's car.

"You don't have to needle them about Damon so much," Bonnie said.

"Why not? It's funny. You don't think we could use some funny right now?"

"Of course I do," Bonnie said. "That's not the point."

"What is the point?" Caroline shook her head and started walking a little faster, mostly so that she wouldn't have to look at Bonnie anymore. "I'm scared, okay? If making fun of them about Damon makes it better -"

"Then you will, I know. That makes sense. It's not - I'm not trying to say you can't. I just...I don't know." Bonnie frowned. "I have no idea what I'm trying to say."

"That makes two of us," Caroline said cheerfully.

"You seem...really kind of okay with the whole werewolf thing. All things considered."

Something in Caroline's stomach knotted. "It's like we haven't known each other since kindergarten," she said, turning her face away.

"What?"

Caroline sighed. She didn't know why she'd expected Bonnie to get it or why she was so disappointed that she hadn't. "Nothing. Ignore me."

"No, what did you mean?"

"Okay, did I or did I not just say to drop it?"

"I don't take your orders, Caroline. Tell me what you meant."

Caroline snarled and turned to face Bonnie. For a second there was nothing, absolutely nothing, on her mind except this seriously insane need to hurt, to hunt...

And then she registered exactly how freaked out Bonnie looked and felt like a terrible person. "Oh, God."

"If I have to," Bonnie said, "I'll hurt you. Don't forget that."

Caroline didn't doubt that, she really didn't. But thinking about what it might do to Bonnie was scary. Caroline was supposed to be the one who made the bitchy tough calls. About cheerleading, to be fair, but... "You shouldn't have to."

"I know." Bonnie started walking again, brushing past her. "I will anyway."

This time it was easy to be quiet. Both her and the wolf were...well, Caroline was just seriously down about the whole thing. But she was pretty sure that the wolf was impressed. It made sense, in a totally senseless way; wolves were freaky predators, so of course hers would roll over for the first person threatening to kill it. But Caroline, being human and everything, wasn't feeling it.

Plus, it was Bonnie, and that was weird.

"Well," Bonnie said, stopping in front of her house, "this is me."

"Duh," Caroline said, making herself smile. "I know where you live."

Bonnie smiled up at her, and -

The world stopped.

Caroline was pretty sure wolves couldn't purr, but if hers could, it would have been purring like a...machine that purred, whatever, Caroline didn't have room for thoughts when all she wanted to do was grab Bonnie and do _everything_ with her. Starting with kissing.

She didn't realize she'd swayed forward until Bonnie said, "Caroline! What are you doing?"

And Caroline's sense of smell chose that time to kick back in. Bonnie was scared. Really scared, actually. Caroline sniffed. And under that, she was kind of - but she couldn't be turned on. Could she?

Before she had a chance to figure it out, a wall of magic slammed up between them. "Goodnight, Caroline," Bonnie said firmly, and shut the door in Caroline's face.

Which, okay, she kind of deserved.

That didn't stop her from feeling seriously distressed on the way back home, though. She felt like she was eleven and it was her first real dance. And she was getting used to things being constantly weird, she really was - except that this wasn't just garden variety weird. This was alien abduction, Pacey from Dawson having an actual career weird.

Caroline didn't want to lose Bonnie just because the wolf was being stupid. She kind of figured she'd lost enough this year.

The only good thing about arriving home was that Mom was still at work, so Caroline was free to go upstairs and sulk. So she did. She sulked her way through midnight and the wolf grumbling at her like it thought it was in charge. She sulked until she fell asleep and had sulky dreams about all of her teachers hating her. She was still sulking, in fact, when Bonnie showed up in one of her dreams. Stark naked.

"Um," Caroline said, "what is going on?" Not that Bonnie didn't look good. She totally did. Caroline had a really good imagination. But..."This is weird."

Bonnie shook her head. "You're really devoted to stating the obvious, aren't you?"   
    
"This is a dream, and this is _weird._ "

Bonnie moved towards her. She was smiling in a way Caroline had never seen real Bonnie smile. "But you want it."

"No, I don't."

Bonnie - no, not-Bonnie - reached out and stroked her cheek. "You do."

"I don't," Caroline said loudly, and God, this was so stupid, she didn't want to - she couldn't -

"Shh, it's okay," not-Bonnie said, pulling her in for a kiss.

Caroline decided to go for broke. She started screaming, knowing it was the one thing guaranteed to wake her up. And sure enough, the world went black and she woke up with a yell, flailing around and so wet she pressed her thighs together and whimpered a little, pathetically.

She didn't want to be that kind of girl. She couldn't be that kind of girl. And yet, with the wolf pushing in her head, and her own feelings all tangled up like they'd never been before, she didn't know what she was going to do _but_ be that kind of girl.

It took her hours to get back to sleep, but at least when she finally did it, she didn't dream.

||

After that, Caroline was on the lookout for Katherine like her life depended on it. Which, to be fair, it might. School was a lot more interesting when there was the possibility that someone might appear out of nowhere and kill her. "I'm not sure that's a good thing," Bonnie said when Caroline explained herself. It had been two weeks, and things were almost normal between them. Sort of. Well, not really, but Caroline could pretend.

"I mean, it keeps me from thinking about how I'm a big, scary monster. So there's that."

Bonnie had gotten way more used to Caroline being Caroline. "Please. You're not that big, or scary."

Caroline bumped her with her hip. "Said the witch."

Bonnie looked away, and Caroline's early morning, maybe-school-won't-suck-that-much-today buzz died. "Do we have to be like this?"

"Like what?"

"Awkward."

"I'm trying. We both are." Bonnie shook her head. "It's going to take time."

And okay. Objectively, Caroline knew that two weeks wasn't actually a long time, and that things would get better, and blah blah blah maturity. But right now she didn't care about the future; she cared about having her friend back. "We've had time."

"And we'll need more time." Bonnie whirled to face her. She looked small, Caroline thought stupidly; small and kind of scared. Why was she scared? "I'm trying, okay? I swear I'm trying."

And suddenly it was enough. Caroline was just tired. "Okay. I - okay. I'm going to go home."

It really proved how screwed up they were that Bonnie just said, "I'll see you later."

The wolf was pretty close to the surface as she left. All the smells of high school, the ones she was just getting used to ignoring, were practically clawing at her. She wanted to just let loose and bite someone. Really bite, not just think about biting, or maybe sniff at a little. Bite and chew.

Ugh, she was grossing herself out.

She waited two hours before she called Matt. He was getting vaguer and vaguer lately about what he was actually doing. She knew it just made sense, that they were two teenagers and it was only natural and blah blah blah, but that didn't mean it didn't totally suck or that she had to like it. Drifting apart was total crap.

And it also meant there were no makeouts in her near future. Not that she'd thought there were going to be, because she respected Matt's choices and he was free to go away for as long as he wanted. But being sure of it totally, completely, comprehensively sucked.

Plus, she was horny. If she could avoid ravishing him or whatever, she'd bet their hypothetical reunion sex would be awesome.

"Hi," she said when he picked up. "Has your day sucked? Because mine has. Like, the big one."

"I'm sorry," Matt said, sounding exactly as sincere as he always did. Caroline sort of wondered sometimes if he practiced it alone in his room at night, or something. But no, she thought, he was exactly that nice.

Which was why it sucked that all her feelings for him were turning into this big ball of complicated she didn't even know what.

"Bonnie's being weird again," Caroline said. "I told you about the last time she was being weird, right?"

"Three days ago? Yeah."

"I know I've been talking about her a lot lately," Caroline said. "Sorry."

"No, no, it's fine. It's okay, Care. I just..."

He sounded tired, and Caroline wasn't actually clueless. "You need to go."

"I don't want to."

"No, it's fine." Don't be a jealous bitch, she told herself. Don't be that girl. Don't be - "You left Mystic Falls for a reason."

The second it came out of her mouth, she winced. "Um, if it helps, I didn't mean that how it came out."

"Didn't you?"

"No." She was going to be brave now. "I meant I don't think this is working out."

There were tons of things he could have said to make her reconsider it. He could have, like, dramatically cried or begged, obviously. Or he could have just said he wanted to keep trying. But instead, he said, "You know? I think you might be right."

And Caroline tried not to lose it like a giant head case, because he sounded relieved. And now she _felt _relieved. And being a teenager was the absolute, total worst. "If I cry," she said, "I just want you to know it's not your fault. I mean it is, but like, there are hormones and stuff, and...we can still be friends, right? I want to still be friends."__

"Of course we can still be friends." Matt paused. "So. Want to tell me what's up with you and Bonnie?"

"I just told you, didn't I?"

"Not all of it. From what it sounds like, you guys are being seriously weird with each other,"

There was no way, Caroline reminded herself, that he could have any clue what her dreams had been the past few days. And even if he did sort of know, people had sex dreams all the time. It didn't mean anything, "There's stuff going on, and...I don't know. She'll get over it."

"Are you sure? Because, um, it kind of - I mean, if she was a guy I'd say you had a thing for her. You know?"

"No," Caroline said way, way too loudly.

"Wow," Matt said after an incredibly long and awkward silence, "I never would've called it. Not in a million years."

"Except for how you kind of did, remember? Like, two seconds ago. You totally called it." Caroline took a deep breath. "Before I did."

"Oh. Oh, wow. Um."

Caroline clutched the phone and very stubbornly didn't turn into a wolf so she could lick her wounds or something stupid like that. "So, yeah."

"Are you sure? About her, I mean."

"No," she said, because seriously: sex with girls? Yes please, the wolf was saying, but that didn't mean _Caroline _wanted it. "Especially not...I mean, it's Bonnie. Things are totally screwed up, but if I made a move or something they'd be so much worse."__

"You've got a point. She is pretty, though. So, uh. I don't know, tap that? Bro?"

He totally wasn't even trying to be funny - that was just Matt being Matt. But it made her laugh anyway. She was also kind of choking with the effort not to cry, but whatever, considering everything that was happening, she was counting that as a victory. "Is that seriously what you'd say to a guy?"

"Well, it's what Ty would say to a guy."

"Flattering. Thanks."

"Any time." Matt paused. "Bro."

Caroline snorted and sniffled a little, and then snorted again, because - this was so stupid, and weird, and she felt like she was seriously disordered for even thinking it, but she was kind of...excited.

In a terrified kind of way.

Matt didn't bring up trying to actually do anything about her giant crush thing, which was good, since she probably would have panicked and hung up. She wasn't even ready to be all Katy Perry, much less...whatever the actually gay version of Katy Perry was. Or bisexual. She'd probably have to Google it so she didn't sound stupid if she ever actually brought it up with Bonnie. Either way, she wasn't even a little bit ready, and Matt got that. It was nice in a way she was pretty sure being exes wasn't supposed to be.

But she was a werewolf. She, Caroline Forbes, didn't have time for the way things were _supposed _to be.  
    
||   
    
Bonnie didn't really touch Caroline anymore. Which considering that Caroline had pretty much come on to her, it made sense; but that didn't mean Caroline had to like it. The wolf was doing whatever the mental version of pacing was, and it had been doing it for days now, and Caroline just wanted to reach out and sniff Bonnie and then maybe hold her down and do lots of freaky stuff to her, and god, why was she so _insane_? __

"Okay," Bonnie said. "So: balancing equations."

"Ugh," Caroline said, flopping back down on the couch. "Can't we just watch TV?"

"I'd like to pass. I don't know about you."

Caroline sighed - and then regretted it, because sighing meant she had to inhale and Bonnie smelled so incredibly good.

"Caroline?"

Caroline blinked. Bonnie was looking at her with an expectant face. "Crap, is it my turn?"   
Bonnie nodded and held the book out.

Okay, right. This was fine. Caroline could do this. She took the book, ignoring the sparks that jumped through her when their fingers brushed. "Um," she said, staring down at the equations and trying not to do anything stupid.

"It's this one," Bonnie said, scooting forward the little distance it took to point at the problem in the book. "It's not too hard. I don't think."

"Right." Caroline snorted. "God, isn't this even a little bit ironic to you? Katherine's all, woo, I'm going to kill you, and we're sitting here studying chem."

"It's all we can do." Bonnie picked at the couch. "And anyway, you have enough to deal with without also worrying about Katherine."

She smelled worried. "Bonnie," Caroline said, and reached out to touch her arm.   
Bonnie's head snapped up and - oh. _Oh._

Caroline moved without thinking, pushing the book to the side and cupping her hand behind Bonnie's head. And it wasn't like kissing a boy at all, it wasn't like kissing anyone, not because the kiss was different but because it was _Bonnie_. Bonnie's mouth opened a little and Caroline pulled back just enough to give her time for second thoughts before pressing back in, tongue -

Doing nothing, because Bonnie shoved her away so hard there had to have been magic behind it.

"I can't," Bonnie said, leaping to her feet and wiping her mouth. "I'm sorry, but - Matt - and I just, I just can't."

Caroline was still staring when Bonnie ran away.

||

She was totally, completely, absolutely not thinking about what that kiss with Bonnie could mean when Elena texted her. _is Bonnie with you? d &s rings gone. need you to come over. ___

 _txt her im on my way_ Caroline sent, and started running.

It wasn't that she was super eager to help the Salvatores; she just didn't want to have to deal with Elena asking awkward questions. The less she knew about what was going on, the better.

Caroline had no idea how this was her life.

"Is Bonnie going to be here soon?" she said when she found them in the living room.

"I figured you'd know where she was. She hasn't answered her phone." Elena was sitting on the couch next to Stefan. They were holding hands, and it was so incredibly normal that Caroline was suddenly, screamingly jealous.

"I'm not psychic," she snapped, leaning against the doorframe. "She'll come when she comes. God."

"Can we not?" Elena glared at her.

And, okay. The glare was actually epically not scary, but Elena sounded like she had the night of the spring formal in eighth grade, when she'd totally lost it at the planning committee and almost brained Amy What's Her Name with a broom. "Sorry. Um. She might be in the shower?"

Damon didn't even make a dirty joke. Things were really serious, then.

"Damon and Stefan can't find her, they can't go outside," Elena said. "Can't you smell her or something?"

Caroline should have been able to guess that Elena would ask her that. "Um, maybe," she said, and made a big deal out of concentrating.

Normally she would have been fine with lying, too, but...not right now. There was obviously a lot at stake. "Give me five minutes," she said, and changed into the wolf. Bonnie's scent stood out when she was like this, even though Bonnie herself had to be at least a mile away. She barely heard Damon say, "She's so much niftier now," before she was running off.

She was pretty sure the world could be ending and she would still love running. It took up so much of her mind, wiping everything clean of the desire to do annoying but keep running until she was too tired to move. And right now the wolf was holding Bonnie in her mind, because to her, this was a treasure hunt.

Bonnie looked honestly surprised to see her. "Caroline? Is something wrong?"

Caroline looked around to make sure it was safe and changed. Bonnie snapped her fingers, and she was wearing a slinky red dress that looked Ike she'd stolen it from a hooker. "I'm not Lassie, you know."

"We're not exactly going through a BFF phase right now," Bonnie said. "So what's up?"

"Elena's calling a war meeting," Caroline said. "She looked mad. Like eighth grade formal mad."

Bonnie's eyes widened. "Crap."

"Basically. We're supposed to report to the Salvatores'."

"Let's go, then." Bonnie picked up the pace, which Caroline was totally fine with, except - "Do you think you could give me something a little less stripper-y?"

"Oh." Bonnie looked embarrassed. Caroline would be too, if she had magic that was that awkward. "Sorry." A moment later, Caroline was wearing jeans and the world's most boring top. "You're not going to run back?"

"And show up naked in front of Damon?"

Bonnie made a face. "Point taken."

She knew Bonnie probably didn't want to talk, but Caroline just wasn't the kind of person who could magically be quiet because things were awkward. Even though, okay, usually things were awkward because she'd gotten tipsy and made out with someone's boyfriend, or something, not because she'd kissed her best friend and kind of wanted to do it again.

Or really wanted to do it again.

"So. How've you been?"

Bonnie stared at her. "Seriously? Are you really going there?"

Caroline sped up a little. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"That's a line, Caroline. You're using a line on me."

"You're imagining things. It's embarrassing."

"I don't know how you get boyfriends, I really don't," Bonnie said.

"I don't want a boyfriend!" Oh, great, maybe she could just fall into a hole and die.

"Well, that's...doesn't matter," Bonnie said. "Right now. Because we have stuff to do."

"Clearly," Caroline said snidely.

Bonnie sighed and didn't answer.

"Oh, good," Elena said when she opened the door. "Come into the living room."

She waited until they were both sitting (and not looking at each other) before she said, "Katherine stole the rings, kidnapped Tyler, and put Jenna in the hospital. She was trying to turn her - Alaric interrupted, but she got pretty close."

God, could nothing go normally even for two seconds? Caroline could feel panic taking over - sheer, uncomplicated, wolf-approved panic. Which was why the next thing that came out of her mouth was very, very stupid. "Okay, so Katherine's a total bitch. Anything else you need to tell us that we already know?"

"Stefan and I are stuck inside. I'm going to get bored really, really quickly. Maybe you shouldn't antagonize us." Damon smiled blandly.

Caroline bared her teeth. "Ooh, I'm so so scared."

"Guys. Can we not?" Elena quit leaning against the wall and squared her shoulders. Something sort of disturbing occurred to Caroline, and she glanced around the room to be sure she was right. And, yeah, pretty much everyone in the room would do what Elena said, unless she was really talking crazy. Even Bonnie would back her up.

And, okay, she might have to kill someone behind Elena's back afterwards. But still, she wouldn't just straight up tell Elena no. Not anymore.

It was seriously creepy, and also kind of awesome.

"I just think we're doing this pretty wrong," Elena said. "We can't manipulate her, we know that. We need to do something she's not expecting."

"She knows us," Bonnie said quietly. "She knows what we'll do before we do, it feels like. How do we fight that?"

"By fighting," Elena said. "Literally. Isobel studied us for her, right? Had people figure us out. So, we fight. It's the one thing she's not expecting us to do."

"And then?" Caroline said. She knew there was a master plan, because there had to be. No one talked like that if they didn't have a master plan.

And sure enough, Elena smiled, all stressed and totally in control. "She won't be counting on us having a werewolf of our own."

For a second Caroline was sure she'd heard wrong, because big, epic last stand plans were totally fine, as long as they didn't include Caroline being the hero. "Excuse me?"

"You're a werewolf," Elena said.

"Yeah, thanks, I remember."

"You just have to get close to her," Elena said, "We'll get you the opportunity. And then -"

"What, I pull a miracle out of my butt and send Katherine packing?" Caroline laughed, or tried to. It sounded hollow even to her, "Yeah, awesome plan. It will totally work."

"Caroline," Bonnie said quietly.

It seemed suddenly, impossibly ridiculous that Bonnie of all people could be trying to rein her in right now, and Caroline just...snapped.

"What, _Bonnie _?" Caroline whirled on her. "Do you have some kind of brilliant plan, too? Since you have magic and all, maybe you can use it to tie me up and give me to Katherine on a platter!"__

"Whoa, okay, crazy." Damon sidled between her and Bonnie. Caroline very carefully didn't punch him. "That's enough, don't you think?"

He wasn't looking her in the eye. Smart, considering the wolf thing. She didn't like smart right now. "No, I don't."

"I know you're scared," he said. "Among...other things. But you need to get a grip. Have your teenage gay tantrum later, okay? Right now is grownup time."

"Oh, sure, says one of the two people Katherine isn't planning on killing. You don't have a whole lot to lose, do you?"

Damon looked murderous. Good. "Listen, werewolf, you might have noticed, we've invested a lot of time in this town. You all might be stupid sacks of meat, but -"

"Oh, fuck off and _die _."__

"That's enough," Stefan said when Damon took a step forward. "Caroline, take a walk. Cool down. We'll talk about it when you get back."

The part of Caroline that wasn't wrapped up in the wolf's weird animal rage could recognize that she was being a total lunatic, so she practically threw herself at the door to keep herself from actually attempting to kill someone. She didn't go farther than the porch, though. She was pretty sure the wolf wouldn't let her go far away from Bonnie right now, which was so terrifying Caroline didn't even know how to react to it.

After a few minutes, Damon came out. Her fist jerked back to punch him before she even realized what she was doing, but he just nonchalantly caught it in his hand, like people suddenly trying to punch him happened all the time.

Though actually, it probably did.

"You got really, really crazy in there," he said.

"So send Stefan out," Caroline said. "I'll actually tell _him_ about my feelings."

Damon shrugged and leaned forward, elbows resting on the porch railing. "You were right, you know. When you bitched me out the other day? Completely, unexpectedly right."

"So? What I said is still true. You don't get to just -"

"Spare me version two of the speech, would you?" Damon smiled a little. She couldn't help but feel like that was a bad sign. "Anyway, I know what it's like to have a crazy killer monster in you."

"Um, because you are a crazy killer monster. Stefan's the one who controls his. So he should be talking to me, not you."

"Please. Are you even hearing yourself? Stefan's like Bonnie and Elena. He's a good person. He wouldn't kill a busload of orphans for Elena."

Seriously, what was going _on_ with them? If this ended in love triangles and crying Caroline was going to seriously knock some heads together. "He'd watch you do it. How does that make him a good person?"

Damon shrugged. "Love does weird things to you when you're a vampire."

"I don't feel weird, I just feel angry." Caroline thought about seeing Bonnie run away from her, the idea of smelling other people on her. "Really angry. It sucks."

"You're going to have to deal with it." Damon sighed. "Why don't we stop pretending I don't know who you're wolfing it out over? It's not like Bonnie is going to tell you no."

"Bonnie's a good person. You just admitted it. She's not just going to...whatever...with me."

"Even actually good people aren't as saintly as they like to pretend they are." Damon pushed himself off the rail. "And the little witch is more like Stefan than Elena. Push her a little, see what she says. I promise you, no one is so good they'll ignore you just offering yourself up on a platter like that. Which, by the way, isn't the plan with Katherine, and when you're done being all crazy and animalistic, Elena can explain the real plan to you."

She didn't have time to think of a response before he went back inside.

The truth was, she wanted to face Bonnie like she wanted a hole in the head. But she was kind of worried Elena would give her one if she didn't woman up and listen to the whole plan, so she let herself pout for a few more minutes before giving up and going in.

"Okay," she said, throwing open the door. "What's the plan?"

"We have to get Ty away from Katherine."

"I don't see why," Caroline said. "It's his own fault for being an idiot about her. He probably thought she was Elena even as she was luring him out to her evil lair or whatever."

"You can't blame the guy. Hey, _I'd_ -"

"That's enough, Damon," Elena said loudly.

Damon smirked at her but didn't say anything else.

"So we have to get Ty as soon as we can. She can't have turned more than the three people who've shown up missing."

"Unless she turned a bunch of out-of-towners, too." Bonnie looked grim. "We should accept that we might be dealing with a werewolf army."

"Ugh," Elena said. "Okay. So...all hands on deck, I guess. Damon, talk to Alaric, see if you guys can retrieve Ty. You can do a locator spell, right, Bonnie?" Bonnie nodded. "And Caroline, you get the fun part. Congratulations."

"Do I want to know? Never mind. Hit me."

"You get to kill Katherine."

Caroline's vision just sort of whited out, which she thought was completely understandable considering that Elena had just pretty much told her to commit suicide. Still, she was surprised when Bonnie was the one who said, "Are you crazy? I thought you just wanted her to distract her or something. No."

"It's not like I want her to," Elena said. "But it's the most logical solution."

"No, it's not."

"Werewolf bites can kill vampires, you told me yourself," Elena said. "She has a better chance of doing it than any of us."

"And I'll be there to back her up," Stefan said.

"I don't care. Involve someone else in this. Caroline has nothing to do with Katherine's obsession with this town. She shouldn't have to -"

"Bonnie."

Bonnie turned to look at her immediately. Caroline wasn't really surprised that the wolf reacted to how tiny she looked, seated on the couch between Damon and Stefan. But Caroline-the-person knew exactly how dangerous she was. "This is the best solution."

"Like hell it is."

"I'm not human anymore, Bonnie. This has to do with me whether I want it to or not. I'm not happy about it, but that doesn't make it any less true."

"It's too dangerous."

"Because just hanging around, waiting for Katherine to kill us, is safe?"

Bonnie looked away. Caroline felt bad pretty much right away. "I'm not happy about it. If it was practical for me to, you know, not risk dying, I would."

"I know. Okay? I swear, I know. It's just hard."

Caroline looked over at Elena. She was looking at Bonnie, eyes narrowed. And Caroline might have known Bonnie for forever, they might be super close and blah blah blah, but no one could read Bonnie like Elena.

And Caroline wasn't sure what that meant.

"Okay," she said loudly. "So that's enough of that, don't you think? I'm going to go to the gym."

"The gym? Really?"

"The wolfy part wants exercise." Caroline smiled as sunnily as she knew how. "Don't wait up."

For the whole two seconds it took her to walk to the door, she thought for sure that she'd gotten away. But then Bonnie said, "I'll come with you," and followed her out of the door.

"It's not going to be very interesting," Caroline said as they walked away from the house.

"It doesn't have to be." Bonnie hugged herself, shivering a little. It was a little cold, but Caroline was still comfortable. "I'm sorry about acting like your mom in there."

"Don't worry about it. My mom never apologizes."

"Good point. So are we really going to the gym?"

She thought it over. Exercise was healthy, and she really did want some, and...

And Bonnie sweating in tiny shorts and a sports bra.

"Yes," she said.

"Luckily for us, I can just magic up some clothes."

Caroline glanced at her in time to see her smile a little - quickly, sharing a joke just between the two of them. Caroline didn't think her naked adventures were all that exciting, but then, Caroline was a depraved sex monster or something.

Which explained why, when they turned the corner and Bonnie bumped into her, she had to fist her hands to keep from reaching out. "Sorry," Bonnie said, moving a foot away. It seemed like overkill, unless she actually knew what Caroline was thinking. Oh, God, Caroline hoped she wasn't that obvious. "You're way too graceful like this, you know."

"Huh? Oh. It's just a side effect, I guess."

"It's annoying."

Caroline looked over at her. And, okay, Bonnie was smiling, but Bonnie was totally the type to smile right before she hexed your face off. And Caroline knew the reason she couldn't judge Bonnie's expression was because she was crazy about Bonnie - like, actually crazy, not just huge-crush crazy. But it was still frustrating. "Do you ever wish things were different?"

"With us? Always. If Grams was still alive, if me and Elena -"

"What?"

"It's nothing."

"Um, it so very obviously is something. Come on, Bonnie. You can talk to me."

"Can I?" Bonnie stopped and turned to look at Caroline. She looked angry and open and Caroline had no idea what to do. Sniffing her and licking her neck probably wouldn't help. "Because if I tell you I'm worried about what's happening with me and Elena, I get the feeling you'll just be happy about it."

Caroline wanted to be hurt and argue. Well, she was hurt, but she couldn't argue, because if it wasn't true right now, it would have been three weeks ago. Bonnie couldn't know that she'd changed that much.

"I won't think that," she said. "Maybe you don't believe me, fine, okay. But I won't."

Bonnie looked away. "Maybe later. Let's just go to the gym, okay?"

Caroline squashed her disappointment as best as she could. It wasn't exactly easy, considering that the wolf apparently thought it was completely entitled to all of Bonnie's feelings. Knock it off, she thought at it, and followed Bonnie wordlessly.

||

She wasn't exactly happy about the whole killing Katherine thing, and so she avoided thinking about it for another day and a half, until her world history exam was over. Then she called Elena and said, "I just realized something."

"What?"

"No one told me how I'm going to kill Katherine. Or when."

"Damon was supposed to - never mind. We're aiming for tomorrow afternoon. It's the day before the full moon - Ty will be a handful, and she won't have killed him yet. But we only get one shot."

"Ugh. Okay. I've mentioned I don't want to do this, right?"

"None of us do."

"You're probably not going to die doing it, though."

"If you die, I might die afterwards. Bonnie'll kill me. Or Stefan and Damon, at least."

"Please. Bonnie would never kill you."

"She would kill Stefan and Damon, though." Elena sounded deadly serious. "Caroline, there's something going on with you guys. It's kind of obvious."

"There's really, really not."

"I think there kind of is."

And it was never all that easy to tell what Elena was thinking - it was yet another thing about her that Caroline was jealous of. But right now she sounded guarded even for Elena. "I don't know what you're looking for," Caroline said after a few seconds. "I'm not out to steal your best friend or whatever." The wolf disagreed, but Caroline was getting used to that.

"I know," Elena said. "I'm trying to ask you - " She sighed. "Do you have a thing for her? It's okay if you do."

Caroline wanted to _die_. "No!" she yelped, and hung up the phone.

Okay, that was the least stealthy thing she'd ever done. The wolf was mad at her for being a coward, and wanted her to go out and bite someone or something. And actually, biting sounded okay to Caroline, too.

So the full moon was going to suck. Awesome.

After thinking it over for a few minutes, she called Stefan. "Will I screw up the master plan if I change and go running tonight?"

"That depends. Will you kill anyone?"

Maybe, the wolf was thinking. "No!" No, she told the wolf again. God, none of this made sense. "I just feel...itchy."

"I'll come with you."

"Um, don't take this the wrong way, but I'm pretty sure I'd end up killing you. With the instincts, and all."

"So we'll see if you can suppress them. It's going to take more than instincts to kill Katherine."

"Right, okay. Also, and try not to cry about this, but I don't need a babysitter."

"Believe me, I know." Stefan sounded amused. Well, at least one of them was enjoying things. "But you could use a friend."

Why couldn't Caroline have been turned into a vampire instead? Then at least she'd know that in a few hundred years she could be a total know-it-all. "You're right. Not that that makes me happy."

"I wouldn't expect it to. So. I can meet you at the boardinghouse in twenty minutes."

"Make sure Damon isn't there. I totally would bite him."

"Roger that," he said, and hung up.

Maybe he thought he was funny or something.

She went ahead and dressed as simply as she could, despite the fact that the wolf wanted her to dress up like changing to run around and play was some kind of big deal or something. Which actually, Caroline guessed it was, for the wolf.

The night was even sharper than usual. She had to focus on remembering distance so that she didn't try to kill everyone who snapped a twig two blocks away. It was really nice to get to the boardinghouse, with its bigger grounds and technically dead people.

"Hey," Stefan said. He was leaning against the front door wearing an incredibly tight t-shirt. She stared at him for a second. The wolf was so totally uninterested that it was kind of insulting. Both to Stefan and Caroline's very natural sex drive. Was she going to become sexually dead except for Bonnie? That would _suck._

"Hi," she said finally. "Um. So I guess I should change."

"I rigged something up for you." He nodded to the far end of the porch, where he'd hung a sheet up.

"Thanks." She went up to change behind it. Having clothes ready in a private place would be a nice change.

The world shrank and sharpened when she changed. She had a moment of pure regret that she loved it so much, and then all her human emotions were swallowed up by the wolf.

She could smell Stefan sharply now. He smelled strong, dead - wrong. She bounded out from behind the curtain to attack him, intending to deliver the killing bite and then tear the corpse apart and then find the other one and feel his flesh between her jaws, bone crunching and -

"Okay, ew," Caroline told the wolf.

Stefan watched with amusement as she barked at herself. Were people supposed to talk to their wolves? Maybe she was crazy _and_ supernatural.

When she'd finally settled in with herself, Stefan said, "Ready?"

She bobbed her head, tongue lolling out. It felt way, way too good. Stefan laughed - she was going to yell at him later for laughing at her, an idea her still-grumpy wolf agreed with - and started running.

It was easy to keep up with him, even when he sped up so that she couldn't see him; he always circled back, and thanks to her insanely good senses she always knew where he was. They got out to a field and she tackled him, laughing when he made a face at her drool getting all over him. Everything was sharp and clear, beautiful, and the wolf was coming around to seeing Stefan as a friend, which meant she could jump over him and roll around with him, and just lose herself, all the problems that were weighing her down, in the sheer enjoyment of the moment.

And it meant that when they ran back to the boardinghouse together, she could think about how happy she was - how much this meant. How she thought she wanted to do it again just to feel this uncomplicated, this free.   
It totally wasn't worth it, being a werewolf. But maybe, she thought as she changed back and got dressed with grass stains all over her skin, it was worth it.

||

And then, way too quickly, they were meeting at the boardinghouse to take down Katherine.

"This is it," Stefan said. "We all know what we have to do."

"I can smell all the fear," she said without thinking. "And in case anyone was wondering? It's gross."

"I'm not afraid," Damon said.

"No, you're excited. Which, hi, is totally weirder."

"We'll figure it out," Alaric said. "This will work."

"Even if it does work, one of us will end up dead." Damon raised his eyebrows. It was obvious he figured that person would be Alaric.

"Yeah, and I'm the one risking my actual skin, so...lighten up, or whatever." Caroline frowned at the group.

Stefan smiled back at her, a bit, and then glanced at Elena. They did some weird couples communication, and then Elena touched Damon's arm. "We're going to - we have some stuff to talk over," she said, and they went upstairs.

"Well," Alaric said. He grabbed his crossbow. "I'll see you later, I guess."

Caroline nodded. Was it stupid if it was still weird that he was a teacher? Because it was still so, so weird that he was a teacher.

"That was weird, right?" Bonnie said.

"So weird," Caroline said. "History teachers aren't supposed to be crossbow-wielding vampire-killers."

"I meant with Elena and the Salvatores, but you have a point."

Oh. "They're always weird." Caroline turned to look at Bonnie. Her mouth got dry and it felt like the world was ending, but she was totally getting used to that. "So I guess this is it. One hour till noon, and then -"

Bonnie nodded - and stepped forward quickly, looking nervous. "I..." She licked her lips. "Caroline."

Don't stare at her mouth, don't stare at her mouth. "Bonnie."

"I made you something." She held up a necklace. It looked like the kind you got at a dollar store.

"I'm assuming that's magic, because otherwise, ew and also no."

"It's protection. I think." Bonnie rocked back on her heels. Caroline had never seen her this nervous. "I just...I can't just let you go in there with nothing."

"Um," Caroline said, and then because the wolf was so close to the surface, because she felt like she was crawling out of her skin, she bowed her head and waited.

Bonnie only hesitated for a second before she stepped forward, undid the necklace clasp, and reached around Caroline's neck to fasten it.

And Caroline only took a second. She would swear on the Bible, or maybe her favorite bag, that she only leaned forward, inhaled, and rested her head against Bonnie's shoulder for a second.

Bonnie jerked away. "What -"

"You're short," Caroline said. "I mean! Wait. That's not what I meant."

Bonnie's eyes were wide and she was breathing hard, and the wolf was trying to tell her something, the wolf wanted her to know that she could smell and watch and _know._

Bonnie wanted her.

"I just want you to know this is the most inconvenient timing ever," Caroline said, and leaned forward to kiss her.

It wasn't perfect. Bonnie was shocked again, so she wasn't moving, and Caroline was so full of adrenaline that she felt like she was vibrating. But then Bonnie got into it - really got into it - and all of a sudden, it was everything Caroline could possibly want it to be.

"God," she said, stepping back after a few seconds. Bonnie pulled her hands from Caroline's hair. Her eyes were wide, but she didn't look scared. She didn't even really look surprised this time.

"So that happened," Caroline said. "Can we not be awkward? Because I'd like to not spend my last night on earth being awkward."

"We can do that," Bonnie said, and grabbed her.

Caroline moaned a little - and then pushed back, curling one hand around the back of Bonnie's neck and pulling their hips together with the other. She'd always gotten really into making out, but this was different. This was Bonnie, and she wasn't going to get a second chance to get this right.

Bonnie tugged her hair and bit her lower lip. The wolf in her snarled, pleased, and she shoved Bonnie back against the wall, pushing a leg between Bonnie's thighs. Just like the first time they'd kissed, this wasn't completely different from all the other times she'd made out with people (okay, guys...okay, mostly guys). It was just more.

She wasn't even aware enough to stop herself from pressing forward, knowing it was too hard but not really caring. And maybe it wasn't too hard, because Bonnie just took it and demanded more.

"Wait," Caroline gasped, pulling back. "Public place. Bad plan."

"Damon and Stefan will be able to hear us anyway," Bonnie said, looking vaguely murderous.   
"Can't you do some kind of silencing...thing?"

"This isn't Harry Potter."

Caroline thought it over. She was sort of shocked to realize she really didn't care. "This is a boardinghouse. They have rooms."

Bonnie's eyes were wide. "Are you -"

"Serious? Um, yes. Definitely."

For a second Bonnie was staring at her so hard that Caroline felt completely transparent. Then she took Caroline's hand and kissed her one more time, hard enough to make Caroline's lips tingle a little. "Let's go."

Caroline's stomach felt like it was turning over. They went up the stairs and into the first empty room, and the wolf was seriously _panting_ when Bonnie closed and locked the door. "Here," Bonnie said, tugging her close, and then...

Her hands were small and quick, and Caroline arched against her when she ran her hands up Caroline's back. "I can't stop thinking about how beautiful you are," Bonnie said. She sounded kind of mad about it. "Even before...I thought it was just a fluke. It wasn't."

Caroline thought about how she'd smelled another girl on Bonnie and actually growled. Bonnie jumped - and then pushed Caroline back towards the bed. Caroline wiggled out of her pants, watching as Bonnie took her shirt off and then perfectly matter-of-factly got rid of her bra and pants, so that she was standing there only in her underwear.

And um, wow. "Hi," Caroline said, eyes wide. 

"Hi," Bonnie said, and straddled her lap, kissing her.

Stars didn't actually go off behind Caroline's eyes, but it honestly kind of felt like they should have. She closed her eyes and let Bonnie press her down, finally reaching up to skim a hand over Bonnie's nipples. And - she knew Bonnie wanted her, the whole room smelled like it, but that was totally different from seeing Bonnie's eyes fly shut and watching her bite her lip. "Here," Caroline whispered, and pulled her down so that she could kiss her, touching her hip, her back, her, ass, and then - Bonnie thrust her hips forward against Caroline's hand.

Caroline couldn't help but smile. "See? This is going to be awesome."

"I'll do it myself if you don't do _something_ ," Bonnie said, and then they were kissing again and it was everything Caroline wanted out of life right now.

"We're not going to die," she said, and rolled them over. Bonnie landed on one of the plush pillows, arching her back, and Caroline screwed  up her courage and pulled Bonnie's underwear down.

"I know we're not," Bonnie said breathlessly. "Caroline, God..."

In the end Caroline gave up on the idea that she wasn't going to kiss Bonnie pretty much constantly, stopped pretending that she wanted to do anything but slide her fingers between Bonnie's legs and feel her clench and thrust up, hold her down and play with her clit while she traced patterns on Bonnie's stomach with her tongue, bite her neck gently and hear Bonnie's moans get more and more broken.

And then, of course, Bonnie used her magic to keep Caroline up, touching her until Caroline and the wolf were both totally incoherent. She was distantly aware of reaching out and clutching Bonnie's hand as she came, her vision whiting out, Bonnie over her and in her and filling her senses, exactly the way Caroline was finally, finally ready to want.

||

"You know this makes going to my death like a hundred times worse, right?"

"Keep saying that. I'll tell Mystic Falls to go fuck itself and save you instead."

Bonnie was kind of scary.

"I'm just saying."

"You're just saying you've already given up. I know fighting Katherine is going to be horrible and almost impossible. That's why we have to pretend we're sure we can do it. "

"You know that's the worst logic ever, right?"

Bonnie crossed her arms and glared. Considering that she practically had "quickie" written on her forehead, it was kind of impressive how effective the glare was. "We're going to get through this."

"We're going to get through this."

"Say it like you believe it."

"Except I told you I don't," Caroline snapped.

She regretted it right away, but Bonnie wasn't mad. Her expression just got soft and she leaned in to kiss Caroline. "You're Caroline Forbes, which is why I _know_ you can do better."

Caroline hadn't known being Caroline Forbes was something Bonnie liked about her. She couldn't answer, not right then; instead she leaned in and pressed them together under the sheet, until their limbs were all tangled together. It was sort of uncomfortable, but beyond worth it.

"Ooh, sexy."

"Damon!" Caroline jumped and almost fell off the bed - and then clutched at Bonnie, because flashing Damon was the absolute last thing she wanted to do. "God, have some respect!"

"Why would I do that?" He crossed his arms and smiled at her. "That would be silly."

"Yeah, okay, whatever. Ugh. Throw me my bra, at least."

To her surprise, he actually did it. She was putting it on under the sheet when Bonnie said, "It's time?"

"Right in one, Bennett. You kids clean up. I'll just be downstairs telling Mommy about your behavior. I don't think Daddy let on that he could hear your fun."

"Don't you dare," Caroline said - which he had to have expected, or he wouldn't have warned her.

Sure enough, he just knocked on the door frame and left without answering.

"Would it be so bad if she knew?"

"Right now, right before we totally don't go to our deaths?" Caroline wrinkled her nose. "Yes. God, fighting evil sucks."

"You could say that again."

"Oh, I plan to." Caroline sighed and went to get out of bed.

"Hang on." Bonnie grabbed her shoulder and turned her so that they could kiss. It was long, slow, and deep, and if Caroline had known how good Bonnie was at this she would have done it a way long time ago.

"The wolf likes you, by the way," she said when they pulled apart.

Bonnie actually grinned. "Good, now I can die happy."

"Not funny," Caroline said, but she was smiling, because - well, because it kind of was funny, actually. This whole thing was kind of funny, in a depressing, American Psycho way. She'd take what she could get.

Right before they walked out, Bonnie grabbed her hand and squeezed it hard before dropping it again. Caroline smiled at her, squared her shoulders, and mentally shook hands - paws? Whatever - with the wolf.

Showtime.

||

On the surface, Caroline's job was pretty simple. Hunt out Katherine, kill her. Not easy, but simple.

Except that Katherine wasn't at the hideout with Ty, which meant that she and Stefan had to split up to hunt her. And crazy bitch though she might be, it turned out that she was really, really good at hiding her scent.

"Ugh," Caroline said, and circled back yet again, trying to pick up Katherine's scent again. It would be way easier in her wolf form, but that was the ace up her sleeve, and she wasn't even close to stupid enough to be giving that up this early on.

She was a giant sap, though, holding her necklace as she walked. Maybe it was magic and maybe she was making it up, but either way, holding it felt comforting, right. Bonnie was a badass witch, anyway; Caroline wouldn't put it past her to put some kind of comfort spell on it.

"Come out, come out, wherever you are," she muttered, sniffing the air.

And then suddenly, out of nowhere, a stink was in the air. She'd thought Damon and Stefan smelled pretty funky, but this was so, so much worse. It was a total, full-on stench, so strong it almost knocked her over.

Crap.

She was so very unsurprised when Katherine walked out from the tree in front of her.

"So I ask myself," Katherine said, "how some little Forbes bitch can track me when I'm going out of my way to hide my scent. Flying isn't easy, did you know? It takes work. I didn't come to Mystic Falls to work."

"No, you came to be the creepy stalkery ex no one likes," Caroline snapped. "God, get a grip."

Katherine stared at her. And since Caroline wasn't a moron and was wearing vervain in five different ways, she stared back.

"This is comical," Katherine said. "You think bravery will save you? Did the witch charm some strength into you? They sent you to die. They sent you here to be my victim."

"I'm full of vervain, so that would be smarter than you'll give them credit for."

Katherine sneered and didn't answer. She slowly moved to circle Caroline; Caroline turned to watch her and tried not to hyperventilate.

"There's something different about you," Katherine said. "And it's not witch magic, either. Why don't you share? I might let you live, once I'm done with this town."

"Seriously, everyone gets dumped." Caroline tossed her hair and rolled her eyes, looking as brainless as she possibly could. "Get over it."

And then, when Katherine was amused and obviously gearing up for an attack, she changed.

She lost a couple seconds, and she realized too late that a couple seconds was more than enough for Katherine to catch on and grab her by a leg.

Fortunately Caroline had superpowers and could wrench out of the way. And -

And almost break her leg with the wolf howling to be let free. God damn it.

She circled Katherine, snarling, the stink of her filling her mind with the need to kill. She wasn't going to let Katherine ruin what she'd worked for. The smell might make her want to puke - could wolves puke? God, now was not the time for fun self-discovery - but for once Caroline was getting close to happy, and no one was going to ruin it for her. Especially not some lame, psychotic vampire from the olden times, or whatever.

But she hadn't even finished the thought when Katherine darted at her and slashed through her side with a knife.

It hurt. Oh God, it hurt so bad. Caroline fell to the ground, whimpering, the wolf frantically trying to claw its way to the surface of her mind so it could take over and - Caroline had no idea what it wanted to do, but she wasn't going to let it. She had to win this herself. She had to -

"You're a stubborn little bitch, aren't you?"

"Get a new insult," Caroline said, and lunged at her.

Katherine batted her away like she was a fly, not a huge wolf. She laughed when Caroline fell to the ground and whimpered, circling her slowly. "Nice necklace. Maybe I'll use it to rip your head off."

Caroline would have snarked back, only all of a sudden there was a huge wall of fire to deal with.

"You learn a few things, traveling the world for hundreds of years. You get friends in...interesting places. Now, let's see you get past that." She crossed her arms and waited.

Even without a crazed, bloodthirsty predator in her head, Caroline would have known that Katherine wasn't afraid. But the fire was growing in heat and size, and Caroline was just starting to seriously considering panic when the fire _reached out_.

She bounded backwards, yelping, but it was too late - it was burning her, worse pain than she'd ever felt, lighting up her insides and making the cut on her side flare up with pain. There was nothing in the world except the pain, and Caroline was screaming and screaming and screaming and there was nothing that could stop Katherine, nothing and no one, and definitely not Caroline, who wasn't powerful or smart or anything but dying bloody and screaming.

"Give up," Katherine said. "That's all you can do. That's all you're meant to do. They didn't mean for you to survive, Caroline. You're useless to them. Give up."

Yes, Caroline thought. Yes, yes -

Wait. Why wasn't the necklace burning? Metal got hot with fire. Even Caroline knew that.

And that single moment of clarity was all she needed. The wolf was howling frantically, and she suddenly knew with bone-deep conviction what she had to do. _Okay,_ she told the wolf. _Let's do this._

All things considered, it was sort of anticlimactic when she launched herself through the fire and at Katherine and, with a single bite, tore her throat off.

She changed back almost right away. Her mouth was bloody and disgusting, and she was naked. But the necklace was still resting over her heart, cool and light, and the cut in her side was already healing - though she saw, twisting so she could see the whole thing, that it would scar.

Weird.

She felt way, way too calm. But her brain was still linked with the wolf's, and the wolf was used to killing. Which didn't make any sense, since the wolf shouldn't be more than a few weeks old, but whatever. Caroline knew way, way better than to start questioning magic stuff like that.

Her clothes were covered in dirt and blood, but she put them on anyway before doing her best to get the blood out of her mouth.  She was getting ready to resign herself to the fact that she wouldn't be able to kiss Bonnie for awhile when she realized that she could smell a stream nearby. Okay, there were some benefits to the wolf riding shotgun.

So she rinsed out her mouth, stretched, and headed back for the boardinghouse.

She didn't really want to think about the fight, but she knew that everyone else would expect her to at least mention it, so she tried to hold it in her brain. She didn't want to forget anything - but she also didn't want the memories to kick her ass while she was trying to have yay-we're-alive sex. So she was going to be calm, and collected, and mature.

That lasted until she saw Bonnie on the porch. Bonnie looked at her and the relief hit her like a tornado, and she realized that she was shaking all over and then Bonnie was running towards her and knocking her down and kissing her despite the fact that she was filthy and her mouth was still totally gross.

"You're never doing anything like that ever again," Bonnie said, pulling back to look at her.   
Caroline nodded, then shook her head and said, "What if there's some other evil? It's not like I want to, but I totally might have to, and we should probably accept that and just -"

Bonnie kissed her again.

Caroline hooked one of her legs around the back of Bonnie's, pulling her closer. They really were disgusting, but that was okay. They could shower after they were done being alive and relieved.

After a few minutes, though, they had to stop just because everyone was staring from the porch. Including Ty. If he made a single lesbian joke, Caroline was going to kill him.

"Okay," she said. "So. I guess we should, like, shower and debrief and stuff."

"I used all the hot water," Damon said.

Of course he did. "Then I'm going home. Because I need a shower."

"Just use the cold water," Damon said. "Come on, I thought you were supposed to be tough."

"I thought _you_ were supposed to have more maturity than the average three-year-old."

"Who told you that?"

"Okay," Elena said, "that's enough. Ty, you can go home. Caroline and Bonnie..." She turned to Stefan. "You have multiple showers and a big water tank. And a room for them."

Stefan nodded.

"So that's going to happen. And I'm going to go sleep." Elena turned and went back into the house.

After a brief pause, Damon said, "Well, you heard the woman," and followed her in. Stefan said, "I can show you guys up," which meant they had to actually get up off the grass.

"Whatever, man. I'll see you at school," Ty said. He winked at Caroline as he passed them, and to her surprise, Caroline felt a leaping, excited recognition coming from the wolf. Another wolf to run with would be cool, even if Ty was a giant asshole in so many ways.

"That's so disturbing," Bonnie said, but she sounded pretty okay with it. "Come on, let's go."

Caroline took her offered hand and held it as they followed Stefan to their room. As long as Caroline didn't overhear weird kinky sex, she thought this could totally work out for a few days. It was really pretty nice.

||

"So," Bonnie said once they'd both showered and were sitting on the bed.

Caroline crossed her ankles and then uncrossed them, nervousness filling her mind. "So."

"I -" Bonnie bit her lip. "I really did - before. I don't know, I didn't know what was going on and it sucked so bad, but I had a thing for you, you know?"

"And you still do?"

Caroline sort of hated herself for how needy that made her sound, but Bonnie instantly relaxed and nodded. "I still do."

"This is going to suck. Like, long-term, hardcore suck. We're totally going to have to fight more evil."

"Do you think so?"

Caroline just raised her eyebrows and let her expression speak for itself.

Bonnie sighed. "You're right. But at least...god, this is so corny."

"I love corny. I thrive on corny. Tell me."

"We can do it together."

Caroline felt warmth suffusing her. She was pretty sure she was blushing like a traffic light, and she was _positive_ that she didn't care. "We can."

"In that case..." Bonnie reached out and pulled her in for a kiss.

Caroline hated to have to point it out, but - "I change in a few hours."

"I can restrain you. And that's a few hours we have to...well."

Which was how Caroline ended up bareass naked and giggling from Bonnie tickling her. And then, five minutes later, gasping breathlessly as Bonnie showed her one of the advantages of fooling around with girls before Caroline. Guys _never_ went down on her, and this was Bonnie, and it was awesome in so many, many ways.

"I really, um. You're great," she said when they'd finished and were lying side by side, legs draped over one another.

Bonnie smiled softly. "You, too."

See? We can totally work together, Caroline told the wolf, closing her eyes contentedly. They still had a little while before she had to go down to the creepy-ass cellar, and she was safe here. She really, truly, finally was.


End file.
